On a journey of personal development – or really any life journey – most of us desire to reach our potential. What we may not realize is that limiting beliefs, often hidden in the subconscious mind, are holding us back.
Becoming aware of personal core beliefs is the first and biggest step in shifting to more productive ones. Maybe you don’t want to change your beliefs, and that is OK too. But ideally, you become more conscious of how they are operating in your life.
Before we delve into the most common limiting beliefs, let’s cover the concept of limiting beliefs, aka what they are. Then you’ll better understand the list and ultimately how to overcome them.
To begin with, what are beliefs in general? In short, they are a filter. From my perspective, that is the simplest and most accurate way to describe belief systems. They are a collection of principles or concepts that guide a person or group’s perception of reality. While intangible, the impact cannot be overstated – both for an individual and society as a whole. Beliefs are a type of psychic structure through which you interpret life and everything in it.
Limiting beliefs, specifically, are beliefs that limit you in some way. Limitation = restriction or suppression. They hold you back via negative thoughts and perceptions of self, others, or the world.
There are both inner and outer factors that can contribute to the development of limiting beliefs.
Outer causes or predictors of limiting beliefs include location, family situation and dynamics, gender, race, socioeconomic status, life experiences, relationships, and opinions of others. The truth is that trauma, abuse, lack, and loss often birth negative or fearful beliefs in us. We are also products of our upbringing. This means that you likely developed limiting beliefs through negative experiences early in life, especially in a family or caregiving environment.
Inner factors may include personal interests and preferences, spiritual experiences, natural inclinations, and genetics. Sometimes (or even often) it’s hard to pinpoint where limiting beliefs come from. And really, you don’t need to know. It can be helpful of course, but my suggestion is to not waste too much time and energy trying to analyze everything. That’s a common trap in new age spirituality I have found, related to neverending cycles of “healing” or “ascending.”
Here are the best ways to start to identify limiting beliefs, and beliefs in general.
When a topic or area of life comes up in your mind, what is your first thought? Herein often lies the truth of your beliefs. Do you react positively, negatively, somewhere in between? What is your point of view, perspective, or “reasoning” for why something is the way it is?
Reflect on how life events have shaped you. Unfortunately, most of us have lived through trauma or other difficulties like loss, abuse, or betrayal. Consider what you might have picked up (often inadvertently) through those experiences. Did a particularly painful breakup make you close your heart to love? Did you develop a belief around relationships being hard or not worth it? Journaling on this will help you gain clarity.
Look at the different areas of your life and take an inventory. Where are you fulfilled, where are you not? Your results, or lack thereof, will show you what you need to know. For example, take your professional life. Are you working a job, or for yourself, doing something you enjoy? Nothing is perfect, but do you derive some sense of fulfillment or satisfaction from it? Are you being paid what you are worth? If not, investigate what limiting belief might be lurking beneath that.
Here are 10 of the most common limiting beliefs. Rest assured that you are not alone, as you’ll see here. Most people have believed these at one point or another, or for long periods or even a lifetime. Remember that people usually have no idea they are believing them, otherwise they simply wouldn’t.
Overcoming limiting beliefs is indeed possible. Psychologically, they are a comfort zone of sorts. But that can change. Start with the following.
Do the three steps I just laid out in the prior section to get clear on some of your main limiting beliefs. Awareness really is half the battle – actually, far more than half. Just bringing them to consciousness will start the wheels turning. That’s the value of self-inquiry. Most of these patterns or beliefs are hidden, until they’re not. Journaling and meditation can help you become more aware of your thoughts and beliefs as well.
The brain learns through repetition. Think about how you learned your multiplication tables or how to ride a bike. You repeated the practice over and over again, until it stuck and became part of your knowledge repertoire. Begin to feed yourself positive affirmations and encouragement instead of negative self-talk. Flip limiting beliefs into the opposite or something good (such as, “I am good enough”), and repeat them as much as you like.
I’m inviting you to share your expertise! Please comment below how you have changed or worked with limiting beliefs. Other comments and questions are welcome too. Let’s learn from each other. Change happens in small manageable steps, persisted in over time. And we’re all in this together.
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