The world is but a mirror. While this truth is not black and white, and there are complexities to it, we do indeed live in a holographic universe. One aspect of this is your concept of self, or self-concept. Your self-concept is the internal picture you have developed of who you are. In this post, we will talk about what exactly that means, why it’s important, and how to build a strong one. Because, your concept of self will ultimately be reflected out.
Your concept of yourself is not simply personal traits, physical characteristics, mental health, or even your strengths or weaknesses. The answer to the question: it is who you believe you are at the core. In other words, your identity and deep, inner sense of self. Self-concept can shift over time and through different phases of life, even though the bulk of it is formed in childhood (during which the brain operates mostly in theta or hypnosis).
Also, your concept of yourself can vary according to the area of life in question. For example, you may have a confident, strong self-concept in relationships, but a less favorable one in terms of work or family life.
Here are the main factors that shape the development of self-concept:
To answer the question, what are belief systems, read my blog here.
As I touched on above, your self-concept is reflected outwardly into your life. This is primarily a subconscious process, meaning you and others are not aware it is happening. In the same way that gravity works regardless of whether or not you believe in it, so too are your identity and beliefs affecting your reality. This idea may be hard to grasp or believe, which I totally understand. We are not taught about these dynamics in school or society. I invite you to test them out if you’d like to explore your self-concept further.
Your concept of self is also important because having a deeper understanding of yourself will change your life. Your core self influences everything: your choices, relationships, confidence, boundaries, goals, achievements, and emotional wellbeing.
To better understand what are different types of boundaries, read my blog here.
The short answer is yes. But it may require some effort to change your self-concept in adulthood. That’s because as I mentioned, our brains are extremely malleable especially until age 8, and up until around age 26, when the prefrontal cortex is thought to stop developing. In our young years, both fortunately and unfortunately, we absorb what we are told and what we observe without a filter.
However, self-concept is not fixed forever; it can evolve as people gain new experiences, relationships, perspectives, and understanding. But in order to consciously change how you see yourself and what you believe, you will likely have to put some work in. More on that below.
Self-concept is slightly different from self-esteem and self-worth, as you are probably seeing. For more detail about how to build self-worth and self-esteem, read this blog next. But overall, your self-esteem is higher when you have a positive self-concept. When you have a healthy perception of yourself, you also have solid self-esteem and self-worth. Worth comes from knowing that you are a lovable, worthwhile human being; esteem is more about conditional events or accomplishments.
The nuance of self-concept comes in around beliefs. It is made up of the collection of beliefs you have about yourself. There are different aspects of self-concept because it is your perception of yourself in every category of life.
Here is the framework I recommend if you would like to upgrade your self-concept, or even just check in with yourself.
When you think about yourself in relation to an area of life (such as career, relationships, family, money, etc.), what is your first thought? Herein often lies the truth of your self-concept beliefs. What is your point of view, perspective, or “reasoning” for why this part of life is the way it is, or why you are the way you are? Do this for all areas that you would like to investigate. Journal on it, meditate, or simply reflect.
Most of us have lived through trauma or other difficulties like loss, abuse, or betrayal. Consider what you might have picked up (often inadvertently) through those experiences. Did an early life event change how you view yourself? Did you develop a particular belief around relationships after a painful breakup? Most of these patterns are hidden, until they’re not.
As you uncover what you are believing about yourself or what might be running your psyche and interpretation of reality, reflect on what you would like to choose instead. What is a more balanced, realistic, or encouraging way to see yourself?
Begin to feed yourself positive beliefs instead of negative self-talk. Redirect yourself to a more favorable concept of self. The inner critic or negative self-talk usually originates from limiting self-concept beliefs. Flip them into the opposite or something good (such as, “I am enough or capable or worthy”). Play around with what feels right.
The brain learns through repetition. Think about how you learned your multiplication tables or how to ride a bike. You repeated the practice over and over again, until it stuck and became part of your knowledge repertoire. This process is called neuroplasticity: the brain’s ability to rewire and learn, thus creating new neural pathways.
The work is this repeated practice of bringing yourself back to your new self-concept. Whenever you are triggered or a topic comes up in your mind, or an issue arises in life, remind yourself of who you now are (or would like to be). Over time, you and your brain will get used to this new, more positive self-perception, and ultimately will accept it. But it can take some time and effort. Don’t give up! You are worth it.
If you are interested in upgrading your life and concept of self further, stay tuned for my forthcoming ebook. I will be releasing it soon, and it is chock full of secrets about how to clear your energy and maintain a top notch self-concept for good.
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