If you are a highly sensitive person (HSP), or even if you’re not, you have probably noticed how certain environments or relationships leave you feeling drained or off balance. I deeply understand as both an HSP myself and an empath coach who has worked with clients on grief recovery, trauma healing, and spiritual development.
When you feel drained or triggered, there are many possible sources. One general way to describe this situation is the presence of negative energy. So in today’s post, I will be sharing a practical guide to understanding where that heavy feeling comes from and how to create a positive, calm space for yourself. Remember that the tips I am sharing here are meant to be a complement to, not a replacement for, mental health support from a qualified professional (if you need it).
Understanding where negative energy comes from matters because recognizing what is contributing to that heavy or unsettled feeling makes it easier to choose the right ways to release and reset.
Energy is the fabric of life, literally. Each cell and atom is made of energy, and they are the building blocks of everything else in our reality.
Here are some of the most common sources of negative energy in simple terms:
Everyone is different. But there are some general themes with negative energy, especially in sensitive people. These below are several of the effects you may experience.
The first sign of negative energy is often your mood. Irritability is that unwelcome friend that comes a calling! It marks a disturbance in the force, as they might say in Star Wars.
Another initial way you may know there is wonky energy afoot is that your sense of calm is disrupted. Or you feel stressed more often or at a higher level than usual.
Sleep and energy levels tend to be sensitive, especially if you are highly empathic. Struggling to sleep, insomnia, oversleeping, or fatigue are signs that energy clearing is needed.
If your ability to focus or get things done is lower than usual for a few days or more, it’s worth a look at the energetic influences in your life. That being said, we don’t always feel motivated – that’s life!
Now let’s get to how to address and get rid of negative or unwanted energy. You do indeed have the power to do so. And that’s actually a big part of this. Take your power back and realize you are not a victim. Set the intention now, and be open to possibilities for releasing it. Consider the following options.
Clear out the clutter in your life and home! When you clean or reorganize a space, you are simultaneously clearing out negative energy with it. This explains why many people feel not just satisfied but liberated and free when they declutter a drawer or closet, or donate a bunch of clothes.
Our physical space often reflects our emotional space and deeper psyche. Ask yourself what are you hanging on to? Underlying the attachment to an old item could be a story or a belief system or an identity that no longer serves you. For example, if an ex gave you a piece of jewelry that you still wear, yet you’ve outgrown or are attempting to outgrow patterns from that relationship, it may be perpetuating an undesirable dynamic or energy.
You may also choose to look into feng shui, an entire system of organization originating in China. For example, they recommend making sure there’s a clear path with no furniture facing ahead when you enter through the front door. Experts argue these adjustments can have a profound effect on reducing negative feelings and clearing out toxic energy. In addition to or alongside these methods, simply opening your windows and allowing some fresh air and light in can work wonders. If you like spiritual tools, smudging with sage or using essential oils like lavender or crystals can support the process.
Perhaps the biggest life lesson for HSPs and empaths is boundaries. Boundaries refer to emotional and physical limits or standards. Many of us never learned about boundaries or how to set them growing up. Your feelings, needs, and perspectives are yours, just like someone else’s are theirs. Creating healthy boundaries can make the difference between being weighed down by negative energy, and having control over your own well-being. Your mental health and throat chakra will thank you.
Boundaries start with saying no. Guilt and shame often arise when you’re not used to doing so. Feel the discomfort and do it anyway. It’s not your job to caretake other adults or do things you don’t want to do. Read my blog here on healing codependency for more detailed guidance.
A related point is to become aware of, and then try to limit, your own negative self-talk. This is often running on autopilot without us realizing. Societal programming, family conditioning, low self-esteem, and trauma can make us very hard on ourselves. The good news is that you are in the driver’s seat and can start to have more compassion for yourself.
If it’s a person who is not being kind to you or stirring negative energy, remind yourself that it is usually not about you. You don’t need to adopt their narrative or perception of you. Practice treating yourself the way you would a dear friend.
Moving your body, especially in nature, is one of the easiest and most natural ways to reset and clear negative vibes. Walk, run, sit on the ground, or literally “ground” your feet on grass or dirt. Regular exercise at a gym or at home works too. You can also try mindful practices to boost your results. Check out this blog here for guidance on mindfulness meditation, try these somatic exercises, or work with trauma release here.
Another way to ground yourself that is less discussed is to use sound. Music of all kinds is very powerful, as we all know. One of the ways it does its magic is by helping us ground. Listen to your favorite artists, meditate, go to a concert, or take it up a notch and try singing bowls. You can go to a group session with a practitioner, or find some online. Let the melodies take you on a journey of releasing and grounding.
For more detail about how to block negative energy, read this blog next.
Keeping positive energy swirling and the predominant vibe going forward is all about maintenance. As we know, life is constantly fluctuating around us. Build a practice where you check in with yourself, how you feel, your home, and your loved ones. Keeping up with supportive daily practices (like the ones I’ve shared above), upholding boundaries, and sticking to healthy routines will make all the difference. You can also read my blog about how to protect your energy as an empath.
If you would like more detailed guidance, stay tuned for my about to be released ebook! It’s chock full of even more tips and tricks on thriving as an empath and clearing your energy.
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