The words trauma, traumatic, traumatizing are no doubt overused lately. Our society is going through somewhat of a renaissance in terms of mental health and recognizing the harm of various behaviors, beliefs, and assumptions. This is of course much needed, and long overdue. But the flip side is the exaggeration or misunderstanding of trauma, and co-opting of real trauma by narcissists and in places like social media.
This is a complicated story, but for the purposes of today’s post, we are going to cover what complex trauma is in adults and how to address it. Understanding this topic can help you make sense of patterns you are experiencing or have experienced. Tragically, the majority of people are carrying around burdens from the past that were not healed. It can cause a lot of conscious or unconscious shame, even though in most cases, none of it was your fault. I deeply understand, both as someone who has lived through complex trauma myself, and also as someone who has worked with clients on trauma healing and grief recovery.
Trauma can be defined as an event that causes severe emotional distress. It often overwhelms the individual’s capacity to cope or process what occurred. Common responses to a traumatic experience include fear, helplessness, confusion, dissociation, rage, shame, and depression.
Complex trauma refers to exposure to multiple traumatic events over time. They may occur throughout life, or be concentrated in childhood or adolescence (which are usually the most painful and damaging). It can develop from all types of trauma and in all kinds of different circumstances. Refrain from diagnosing yourself or assuming you have any specific condition. As always, I recommend seeking out a therapist or trained professional to support you in your journey.
The main cause of complex trauma in adults is having repeated or prolonged traumatic experiences. Examples include domestic violence, war, poverty, abuse, neglect, and betrayal. These may also cause complex post traumatic stress disorder (complex PTSD) or other mental health disorders.
The impact of trauma is almost always lasting, and it is often “stored” in the body or mind. When the trauma is repetitive or extreme, the effects increase. The body, or similarly, the subconscious mind, may hold onto the pain or traumatic memories. This can cause additional symptoms over the short or long term – emotional, physical, spiritual, and/or energetic. The nervous system is usually the most affected system of the body, and it often gets hijacked or stuck when there is a traumatic event. Childhood trauma can be particularly challenging. To learn more about signs of repressed childhood trauma in adults, read this blog here.
The primal response to trauma usually involves the amygdala, the part of the brain responsible for danger. The hippocampus and prefrontal cortex are other areas of the brain that might also “light up.” When this happens, the fight/flight response turns on, meaning you feel a compulsion to run away or attack. Freeze and fawn are the other primary psychological responses, which mean freezing in place or feeling paralyzed; or people pleasing, respectively. You may experience something called emotional flooding as well, where you are “flooded” with intense emotions and unable to function as usual. For more specifics on dealing with trauma triggers, read this blog next.
Experiences that can lead to complex trauma include:
People with complex trauma may experience the following effects:
Now let’s go over four foundational ways to address and heal from complex trauma.
Healing starts with acknowledging how you feel. Emotions may seem scary, or you may fear that once the floodgates open, you won’t be able to stop it. The opposite is true; many intense emotions don’t actually even need that much time to release. Let them come out. Sit with them, journal, meditate, listen to music, cry, scream, exercise, whatever feels right at any given moment. This is a very important grieving process. You may be surprised at how much lighter you feel afterward, or as you start to allow this.
Everyone has inner child energy. This refers to the younger, inner you. He or she is the one who was likely most affected by past trauma. You can establish a relationship with this part of you and it can bring profound healing. You can start with a simple meditation or journaling/letter writing to your inner child, if that resonates. For more details about inner child healing exercises, read this blog next.
Cognitive behavioral therapy, or CBT, is one of the best therapeutic methods in my opinion. It means learning to notice, address, and change unhelpful thoughts, beliefs, and actions. Trauma, very unfairly, tends to put a negative lens on everything, or on our thought patterns. CBT is usually done with a therapist, who guides you to see which thoughts or actions are causing distress. A common example is catastrophizing, where you assume the worst or stew in worry.
The next step in CBT related work is pushing back on negative stories, the ones you tell yourself, and learning to see things more realistically or positively.
Finally, consider EMDR and somatic tools. They are excellent, and the other most effective method in my view. EMDR, or eye movement desensitization and reprocessing, involves bilateral stimulation while sharing with a therapist about traumatic experiences. The most common type of bilateral stimulation is side-to-side eye movements. It helps the brain process and “file away” trauma so it doesn’t affect you as much anymore.
Somatic therapies address the body. When shocking, terrifying, or emotionally overwhelming events occur, we are often not equipped to process their enormity. The associated emotions and reactions can be suppressed and go latent. But they don’t just go away. They are stored in the body, and may come up at unexpected times. Your physical health and mental health are intertwined through the mind body connection. Read my blogs on 10 somatic exercises here and trauma release exercises here to get started.
You are well on your way! Healing can be a daunting process, but it is indeed possible. And it’s guaranteed when you have a sincere desire for it. Thank you for your perseverance and for joining me today. I hope you have gained some valuable insights and encouragement. Don’t hesitate to reach out to a trauma focused mental health professional if you need further support. You can also email me at erin@centeredone.com.
© Copyright Centered One by Erin, LLC. All rights reserved.
Photos by:
